325-SYNCPodcast_JessicaSuchan

Jenny Swisher: [00:00:00] Welcome friends to this [00:01:00] episode of the Sync Your Life podcast. Today I’m joined by my friend Jess Suan, and I’m super excited for this. We’ve actually had a chance to talk a couple times in advance, and um, I wish I would’ve had the record button working. I know we chatted because we have so much in common.

Sometimes you meet people that you feel like. They’re your identical twin somewhere else on the planet doing the same thing and serving a similar mission. And I feel the same way about Jess. So, um, we’re actually gonna be doing a, a separate interview at some point with her mom. It’s quite, quite the, the team that we have here working toward women’s health and just helping people sort of reframe the narrative around women’s health.

But I would love Jess for you to just introduce yourself, like tell us like who you are, what you do, like, who you serve, all the things.

Jessica Suchan: Yeah. Thanks Jenny. Yeah, it’s been so fun chatting. I feel like we definitely should have had the mic on ’cause we were just going, but those are some of the best conversations.

Uh, yeah. So my name’s Jess. I’m a holistic health and mindset coach and I’ve been doing this work for the past seven years. I actually, I. Quit my corporate job working at a [00:02:00] marketing agency, um, primarily because I basically hit rock bottom. I developed debilitating migraine headaches, which I know Jenny can relate to, and I didn’t know where they were coming from, although intuitively I knew it was because of the stress levels in my job and the fact that I worked in social media and it.

Never slept it felt like. And at the time I was quite the people pleaser and I was trying to prove myself. And so I would get to work an hour early and I would leave an hour late. And I remember the, um, the thing that people used to always share with me as a compliment was that I was very reliable. I.

You’re so reliable. And at the time I used to think that was such a good thing, but looking back I realized it’s because I had zero boundaries and I didn’t protect my peace. I never protected my energy. I was always saying yes to everything. I was afraid of letting people down. I. Was so anxious on the weekends if I went anywhere and didn’t have wifi, because what if my boss or a client [00:03:00] emailed me?

And so I wouldn’t even go to the beach with my husband if there wasn’t wifi. And I was living in this constant state of anxiety, and it’s really what led me to my body. Basically all of these whispers that were coming in, that I was ignoring, that eventually turned to the screams of these debilitating migraines where I had to take a leave of absence from my job and try to figure it out.

And at that same time, I was also. Trying to figure out how to stop the 12 year cycle of yo-yo dieting that I’ve been doing, gaining and losing the same 45 pounds multiple times, living off of caffeine and rice cakes and a hundred calorie packs. And so it was kind of this perfect storm, and although I was raised by health educator, my mom Candace, who’s now a hormone health educator and the founder of our family business, your hormone balance.

It’s just, I don’t know. I think when you’re younger, you, you just naturally kind of rebel against your parents’ advice. And even though, you know, she didn’t love that I was on hormonal birth control, she obviously [00:04:00] did not like the fact that I was restricting myself in the way that I was doing. But at that time, I didn’t wanna hear it.

I just wanted to be thin. I wanted to be accepted. I was like, whatever, mom. You know? And so eventually I got to this point where I just said, you know what? I have this built-in guru in my life. I’m gonna go back to her. I’m gonna get support. I’m gonna ask her to help me transition off hormonal birth control.

I’m gonna stop all the crazy diets. And I basically just took kind of, I would say a year to heal, bring back a natural cycle. Um, I. Really learn how to bring back in some of those fear foods and balance my blood sugar. And I think as many of us healers do, I just had this epiphany of, wow, I have to help other women do the same thing.

And so. Um, I signed up for the Institute for Integrative Nutrition and I quit my job. It was definitely a leap of faith. It, I, I don’t recommend it to everyone, to just up and quit your job, to start, you know, a passion project. But I did end up having a lot of [00:05:00] side hustles to make it happen so that I had income while I was growing my business.

And it’s been seven or eight years since then and it’s obviously grown a lot since then and evolved in different ways. But I definitely am very passionate about the work that I do and, and I added on the mindset coaching in the last couple of years, going back to get certifications, uh, this year in breath work and meditation, because that to me is such a huge piece of all of this.

Jenny Swisher: Yeah. Yeah. We were just chatting about the role of the nervous system and we were chatting about sort of the conditioning that a lot of women especially have around food and movement. And um, one of the things that you were just telling me that I wanna say here on the show is something that I really resonate with too, is I think a lot of women are living in the land of, um.

I don’t know what the word is for it. I don’t wanna say obsessive ’cause it’s not always obsessive, but just this, this world of like, I mean, even yesterday I was with my daughter in Target and there was a group of teenage girls. We were walking down the aisle. My, of course, my 8-year-old is of course [00:06:00] begging for fruit snacks as we walked down this aisle,

Jessica Suchan: right?

Mm-hmm.

Jenny Swisher: The girls that are in the aisle are looking at the candy and they’re probably like, I would say age 14 to 17. Right? And they’re, and they’re talking about like, they’re already making references in their teenage years to like the candy and the calories and. It’s, it’s Right. And you were just talking about how like, you know the mindset around like making sure that you’re logging all of your meals in MyFitnessPal and you’re tracking those macros.

Right? I know for me it was the heart rate monitor and the calorie burn. Like, am I getting a good calorie burn in this workout? Right. Like, am I sweating enough to, I. To say that this is really worth it. And, and we can get so conditioned in that, like in our, in our minds, in our world, in our own narrative, we are living healthy and this is what it means to live healthy is to, to care about these things.

But at the same time, it’s, it’s literally harming us on so many levels, especially from that sort of nervous system regulation level. So I’d love for you, yeah. Speak to that, ’cause you said that that’s sort of what’s, what’s been your wheelhouse lately. And we’re coming off the heels of our adrenal healing launch where we’re, we’re preaching a lot about nervous system regulation [00:07:00] here lately, so I would love for you to touch on that.

Jessica Suchan: Yeah, I mean, it’s so big because you’re right, we equate everyone’s definition of health is different and I think looking back to those 12 years where I was yo-yo dieting, it’s, it’s unfortunate to say, but I think to me, I. The health to me meant looking a certain way, oh, I weigh the amount that I should weigh, like this arbitrary number on the scale, and I, you know, feel, I feel okay, like, right, I can, I can do my job and get up in the morning.

And, um, and healthy to me is making sure that I hit those six days of high intensity training and I don’t eat too much and I, you know, make sure that. I am taking my supplements here and there. Um, and. Yeah, it was, it became very obsessive and to the point where I really struggled to be present in my [00:08:00] life with the people that I was with, because I would go out to dinner and instead of enjoying the time that I was spending with people, I’d be.

Counting the calories in my head. Okay. If I order this meal, that’s probably about 600 calories. And then I guess if, if I wanna hit my goal of, of, of 600, then I can’t have a drink, but I really wanna drink. Okay. Maybe I’ll just get the drink and then that’ll be an extra two to 300 calories, but that’s okay because I can burn it off tomorrow.

Just take an extra class and then. Looking around and comparing my plate to what everyone else is ordering. Oh, she’s take getting it to go box. She’s only gonna eat half of her meal. Does that mean I should only eat half of my meal? They’re getting dessert. I really want a bite, but I probably shouldn’t do that because then I have to make up and it’s like craziness in your brain.

And so then my friends are sharing stories and we’re supposed to be having this really amazing time together and I’m not actually there. And on top of that, I’m comparing myself to them. Not just what they’re ordering, but how cute they look in their outfits and how fit they are and whatever, and, and bringing it back to myself of, okay, I am still not [00:09:00] enough.

I’m doing all the things and I’m still not enough. And it carried over into the work that I did of needing to please everybody and to make sure that I was well liked. And that is. Freaking exhausting when you’re living on this hamster wheel of trying to meet everybody’s expectations and to get that external validation from the outside of, yep, oh, you look pretty today.

Or, oh, you hit your calories, or, oh, you’re the right number on the scale. Or, oh, you fit into the size two genes, or whatever it is, and. It was extremely dysregulating. And on top of that, I am pummeling my body with these high intensity HIIT training workouts. Knowing nothing about how to sink them with where I’m at in my cycle.

Not stopping to check in with my body to say, oh, you know what? I’m actually really tired this morning. I feel I, I’m on my period, maybe day one, I’m, I’m not feeling so great. I’m having cramps. And instead of really honoring [00:10:00] those signals, it was. You just gotta push harder. You just, you just need to do it.

And if you don’t do it, you’re lazy or you lack willpower. And so, mm-hmm. As a result, I think those years of just being obsessed and not being in my, not being in my body and not being present, it actually created this version of me that, looking back, I don’t even recognize her. I was very uptight. I was really rigid.

I could not even relax. Enjoying a celebratory dinner with my parents. I’ve told this story before, but it was my sister’s birthday and I freaked out at everyone on the table for ordering carrots because they were too high in sugar and we were supposed to be on this diet together as a family, and I couldn’t believe that they were just ordering these C carrots and that they ordered some chocolate at the end of dinner to celebrate my sister’s freaking birthday, and I had a meltdown on them, and it turned into the almost.

I made it about me, but I started crying and it was actually good because it was the first time I let my [00:11:00] guard down and, and shared, I feel so out of my body. I don’t know who I am. I don’t know why I’m so obsessed. I, I feel so resentful of everybody here who’s able to actually just let loose and have fun and just go with what feels right for them.

And I’m actually angry at you for being able to do that. And. This dysregulated nervous system because of all of the stress, because of the comparisons, because of all of the high intensity exercise, it’s no wonder I, it took me, even with all of the natural hormone rebalancing support, it took me almost a year to regain a natural cycle.

Mm-hmm. I had such low energy levels that it was just normal for me to need. A lot of coffee every day, and then to hit the 3:00 PM slump and to immediately race to the coffee pot and to wake up just needing to hit the snooze alarm so many times, and that my self care on the weekends was bottomless Mims, not actually, you know, taking care of myself.

And so. In [00:12:00] the moment, we may not realize it because we don’t take the time to actually snow, slow down, connect and tap in, and that’s what I’m so, so passionate about helping my clients do is actually. Slowing down. ’cause that’s sometimes a lot more challenging than doing more

Jenny Swisher: abs. It’s absolutely my biggest challenge for sure.

You know, like you were talking about working with a client and telling them like, okay, you’re gonna drive to work with no podcast, no nothing, you’re just gonna sit in the silence. Like, that sounds like my personal hell, you know? Does it? Yeah. I mean, it’s. Slowing down is so hard. And I mean, my friend Jen, who, who helped us create the, the Adrenal Healing Program, she knows that, you know, I took her, I’ve taken her yoga classes for years, like probably close to 20 years, and I’m the girl that’s like really uncomfortable in Shabada.

Like I, mm-hmm. I will, I don’t wanna lie still. I. I don’t wanna be like, still with my thoughts, right? So it’s a challenge for me to do that. I’m the girl who wants to go on a walk and listen to the podcast at the same time. Yeah. Um, instead of just go for the walk and hear the birds. Right. Like, that [00:13:00] sounds like boring to me.

So, so slowing down is definitely something that I, I need help with too. But one thing that I wanna call attention to is when you’re talking about this di dysregulation, um, you know, that can look different for everyone. And one thing that I’ve noticed is. Something that Dr. Paige talks about is how we are constantly sending signals to our body, whether it’s verbal, nonverbal, just the way that we’re thinking, like our thoughts are really controlling a lot of how our nervous system regulates.

And so if we are constantly, like you were talking about, you know, worried about the, the calorie content and the carrots or your reader, you know, or the so-and-so’s taking the to-go home box or whatever, like there’s always this sort of narrative that the body just translates as. I am not safe, right?

Mm-hmm. Or I am not. Okay. Whether it’s constantly comparing yourself to your friends or constantly, you know what I mean? Or, or constantly looking at those, your calories consumed or burned or whatever. Like those types of messages. The underlying message that your body is receiving [00:14:00] is, I am not safe.

Mm-hmm. And when, when the body doesn’t feel safe. Right? Or when it feels like something is wrong or you’re, you just dislike yourself or whatever the case is, of course it’s gonna manifest as hormone imbalance. You know, you just said it took you a year to get your cycle back. Um, for me, I went through adrenal burnout in, you know, in my thirties.

And it took months. It took months and months to feel like I was not living in a dysregulated state, like to feel like I had control and I put that in quotations, like that I had control over my thoughts and that I could sort of navigate that. I. In a calm way. So slowing down is, I feel like is so much of it.

And I know the women in my community who are fitness enthusiasts, I would say a lot of them type A, they wanna be in control, they wanna be living this healthy lifestyle. But sometimes you do have to kind of say like, where do I need to put on the brakes? Like where does, where do I need to? Be able to slow down in order to be more present.

Right. So, yeah. Um, one, I’m reading a book right now, and of course I don’t, I’m listening to it on Audible, so I don’t have the, [00:15:00] the title in front of me. I’m actually doing a local mastermind group, um, with my life coach, and it’s all about, it’s like something called, let’s see if I can find it really quick.

It’s like choosing the meaningful over the, let’s see where it’s. It’s called, it’s about time the art of choosing the meaningful over the urgent. And it has been like such a good book for me in this, in this phase of life because I have young kids. I wanna be present for them, right? I wanna, I wanna make sure that I’m like living in the moments with them and not constantly living in this.

I should be doing more or never enough state that I can get, that my brain can get into. Yeah. And so, um. I think this is something that women, especially like as you were talking earlier, I was thinking my husband is sitting there at the same table that you’re, you’re worried about the to-go home box and how much you’re gonna eat and da, da da, and the, the, the typical male would be like, I’m gonna order the burger.

Right. Their mind right is like. I think I’ll have the steak with the fries. You know, like there’s no other subconscious narrative. So, um, women, this is, this [00:16:00] is something that women, I think, whether it’s diet, culture, whether it’s, you know, how we’re raised or whatever, like we do have these sort of things that can lead to dysregulation, right?

These things that aren’t serving us in women’s health.

Jessica Suchan: Yeah. And actually one thing I wanted to say on that, I just did a whole podcast on my podcast about this yesterday ’cause I just felt really fired up about it, is I think a lot of women have actually been taught not to trust themselves. Mm-hmm. And I believe that one of the biggest missing links between where we are now and where we want to be is self-trust.

And there’s so many signs. Of lack of self-trust that you can look at. But one of them being, if you’re the kind of person who’s always shoulding all over yourself, like, I sh I should order this, or, or no, I, I shouldn’t get that. I shouldn’t get the glass of wine. I shouldn’t order the extra thing. I think should I work out tomorrow?

Oh, I should be more disciplined. I shouldn’t need this much rest. I’m lazy. You know? [00:17:00] Uh, I should be happy. I have so much to be grateful for. Like all of these shoulds that are. Just taking over and not actually tuning into what feels good in our own bodies. And I think that’s a lack of disconnection from our bodies.

And how that can also show up is. Constantly outsourcing to everybody else thinking that everybody else knows better than you do. Everybody else knows the answer to your struggles, whether it’s weight loss or even hormonal imbalance, or not getting to the next level in your business or not finding your dream partner, whatever it is.

But we are constantly outsourcing. We are listening to, I mean, we’re always plugged in. Don’t get me wrong. I have a podcast. I speak on podcasts. I listen to podcasts all the time, but. We constantly have something in our ears, whether it’s a podcast or an an audible or, um, you know, then we’re watching TV or Instagram tiktoks, like [00:18:00] even.

Asking our friends what we should do. And if you notice that your, ’cause I used to do this all the time, was, okay, well I must not know what’s right for my body. So I’m going to look towards that influencer, that expert, that celebrity. What are they doing? How have they lost the weight? What are this? I have this gripe with what I eat in a day reels because.

I think sometimes people look at that and they’re like, okay, I’m gonna eat exactly what she eats in a day. I’m gonna do her exact workouts and I’m gonna hope for her exact same results. And then when that doesn’t happen, we get frustrated. We think, well, what am I doing wrong? What’s wrong with me? Should I just try harder?

And it’s like, well, she has a completely different body than yours. Completely different genetics, a completely different blueprint, different hormones. She probably also has a completely different lifestyle. She might be a trainer and is literally paid to work out. That is her job. And maybe you’re a mom with three kids on a full-time job.

Like the [00:19:00] things that she eats in the day are not gonna be conducive to what you need to eat in a day. The workouts that she does, she might be in a completely different phase of her cycle, you know, and so. We, we outsource and then we ask our friends. Okay. Even, and, and little ways of noticing it. Are you, do you have trouble deciding what to wear in the morning without asking someone else for their opinion?

Do you have trouble making a decision, like hiring a coach or getting a certification without running it past your mom, your sister, or your partner? And then if the second they. Say, oh, are you sure you wanna do that? You then doubt yourself, even if you’re really excited about it to begin with. I’ve had this happen a lot where I have a call with a potential client and they’re so excited, like, this is what I need.

I’ve never felt more supported. I’m so excited to get ready, but let me talk to my husband. And then their husband gets in their head about it and they’re like, oh, he, he says, I, I probably don’t need this. It’s, it’s not the right time. We have other things that we need to invest in. [00:20:00] And the second that someone plants that seed of doubt in your mind, you then decide, okay, maybe not.

Maybe this isn’t what I need. Maybe this isn’t what’s good for me. And so it’s not to say that we don’t need a village. We do. We need supportive systems, we need coaches, we need practitioners, but we need the right support. And people that one believe in us, and two, actually take the time to get to know our bodies, our blueprint, our hormones, our health history, the way that we grew up, the experiences that we had, that shaped the narrative that’s happening in our mind.

And so. Rebuilding self-trust, I think is one of the major movers in actually getting to where we wanna be. It’s choosing what feels good for you in the moment, and knowing that even if it doesn’t work out exactly as you had hoped, you trust yourself and your body to figure it out. You’re resilient enough, you’re strong enough, you’re brave enough, you’re smart enough, you will figure it out.

You’ll keep advocating it for yourself, and you’ll keep [00:21:00] making progress. But. It comes down to the small little commitments that we make to ourself every day. Are you keeping the promises that you make to yourself or are you consistently not following through? And as women, especially when we come from that all or nothing mentality, I.

We make these huge promises, these huge commitments that we can’t keep. I’m gonna work out six times a week, 60 minutes, every time, even though I have a full-time job and kids to take, I’m gonna go on this really extreme diet and then we fall off and then we blame ourselves, and then it’s like this constant.

Cycle of trying different things versus, okay, I’m just gonna commit to moving my body in some way every day. That’s gonna be the commitment, and I’m gonna tune in. I’m gonna tap in with where I’m at in my cycle, what feels good. And then once you start to actually keep those commitments to yourself, you build self-trust, you build confidence, you actually raise the standards that you have for yourself, and you’re able to.

Make progress a lot [00:22:00] faster without the start and stop. And there’s a lot of other ways to build more self-trust. But I do think that, uh, I mean, a huge way is, is cycle sinking. Really learning about your body and your rhythms and how to live in alignment with that versus following what everybody else is doing or what everyone else thinks that you should do.

Jenny Swisher: Yeah. So good, so good. Well, there’s so much I wanna say here. I’ll say this like, especially because you are a cycle sinking coach and you live in this world that I live in of understanding the nuances of the menstrual cycle and how it affects our energy, I. Um, I love what you’re saying about just trusting your intuition and building that self-trust, because I find the same thing, like I have dozens of women in my inbox every day wanting me to tell them that it’s okay to rest if their energy is low.

Mm-hmm. Or they want me to tell them what their macros should be when, like we said earlier, if you’re living in dysregulation with your nervous system and you’re constantly beating yourself up, like the macros aren’t, are the least of your problems, right?

Jessica Suchan: Mm-hmm.

Jenny Swisher: So it’s like. Self-trust and intuition really is like the thing.

It is, it is the needle [00:23:00] mover, um, for women to understand. But I love what you just said about you just connected it to cycle sinking because I do think that one thing I’ve seen in working with hundreds of women and teaching them what cycle sinking is. It is so cool to see a woman understand it and then be able to say, oh, this is why I feel this way.

Like, oh, mm-hmm. This is why my energy is, is through the roof pre ovulation. Right? My estrogen is surging and like that’s why I feel so outgoing. That’s why I feel like I wanna push in this workout. That’s why I feel this way. And then it also gives them that sort of like. Reassurance that like when their energy is low, that’s also we’re meant to be this way.

We’re meant to be in free and we’re meant to be high and low. Yes. Like it gives them that permission to say like, oh, I do need the rest. Right? Mm-hmm. So I love that you just, you kind of connected the two like, um, by saying that like, yes, it’s intuition, but above that, like, one way to get there and to really trust your intuition is to understand your body better and to understand like sort of, you know, peel back the onion to understand how your hormones [00:24:00] affect.

Affect you and your energy. Yeah.

Jessica Suchan: Yeah, and I think one little thing you can do, I know we’re coming up on time, but one little thing that you can do that I think is very powerful is just a daily somatic check-in. Basically just a ba daily body check-in where instead of just launching outta bed and just going straight to your phone or whatever you would normally do, laying down just for a couple minutes, one hand on the belly.

One hand on the heart. Take a couple of deep breaths, connect to your body and ask yourself what sensations are coming up for me? Whether they’re physical sensations or tightness or fluttering chest or whatever it is, achiness, um, nervousness, what emotions are present for me, maybe it’s, you know, I’m feeling a little anxious or I’m feeling overwhelmed, or I’m feeling excited, whatever emotions are present, and then you can take it another step further.

Where am I at in my cycle? Let me connect with my cycle right now. How am I feeling there? And then what do I really need? Today, like how? What would [00:25:00] feed me? What would feed my soul? What would feed my body? What would feed my cycle? What is it that I really want? You know, what kind of workout do I wanna do today?

What would feel really nourishing for me for breakfast? Do I need to set a boundary today? Do I actually need to cancel that work happy hour? Because you know what I’m feeling really run down and it’s just not a good time for it. Is there something that I’m forcing or pressuring myself to do that I can release?

I mean, just a 3, 2, 3 minute body check-in. It allows you to connect with your higher self, with your body, your cycle, and your intuition. Instead of immediately going on Instagram, putting on a podcast and listening to what everyone else is saying before you tune in and tap in with yourself, because I promise you already have a lot of wisdom within you.

You really do a lot more than you give yourself credit for.

Jenny Swisher: Such good stuff. Well, I think we just, we nailed it and like we, we said, could we do this in a short amount of time? We did. Yeah. This is so good. I, I know I’m gonna [00:26:00] reference this one often and send this out to women ’cause I think this is exactly what we need to hear.

Um, okay, Jess, tell us where we can find you. Obviously I’m gonna be having you back on the show with your mom. We’re gonna talk more about hormone health. Um, but tell us where we can find you. How can people work with you? Give us all the dets.

Jessica Suchan: Yeah, for sure. So I’m on Instagram at Body Bliss by Jess. My website’s Body Bliss by jess.com.

And I do offer a free curiosity call. So if you’re interested in chatting a little bit more, sharing where you wanna be three to six months from now, you want that extra health and mindset support. Um, you can dm me the word ready to, uh, Instagram dms, or we could put it in the show notes if that’s possible.

Yeah, yeah. Perfect. We can do that. Both. Yeah, either of those would work. So that’s really the best way. Um, I also do offer 90 minute strategy sessions as well, if you want like a deep dive into one area, like cycle syncing or self-trust, um, nutrition optimization. So that’s also kind of a nice segue into all of it as well.

So yeah, those are the main ways. Great. That’s,

Jenny Swisher: that’s easy. We’ll [00:27:00] put everything in the show notes, you guys, so you can simply swipe up. Um, and you can reach out to Jess directly, but you can also. Stay tuned ’cause she’s gonna be back on the show here soon. So just thank you so much for taking the time to do this.

We will talk soon. Thanks for having me.